Assignment. Today we’re the teacher, you’re the student. Your homework? Orgasm 3 times a day everyday for 30 straight days. Sound like a lot. Well one woman actually tried, and succeeded, at completing the 30-Day Multi-Orgasmic Challenge. So no excuses, because she got through it. That means that you can too. And honestly, how fun does that sound..
Sex. An anonymous writer at The Red Lipstick Project, who we will refer to as RLP, wrote about her foray into this extensive sex challenge. She writes about how she’s been single for the past eight months and how it has shaped her view of sex. RLP writes, “But not single and lonely. I’ve surrounded myself with amazing men. Hot, gorgeous, masculine, heart throbs of men. It would have been easy for me to jump into another relationship, but something stopped me.”
Stop. What was stopping her, you’re wondering? Old baggage from a breakup. RLP writes, “I needed to take some time to heal from my last breakup which left me sexually empowered, but dangerously vulnerable.” And after a few forays into casual sex, RLP realized that it was best to maybe take a break from sleeping with people. She wanted to choose making a deeper connection with herself for once.
Satisfaction. Where does it comes from? RLP writes, “Can I find sexual satisfaction, without getting into a relationship? And can I have amazing intimate relationships with men without sleeping with them?” That’s what the entire challenge was about. RLP continues, “I set out to make a daily habit of mind-blowing self pleasure. (Yes - it was exactly as much fun as it sounds.)”
Phases. There were 3 phases that she hoped to hit throughout this process. 1. learning the art of commitment to your own pleasure and that of your partner: consistency. 2. asking better questions to yourself and your partner: curiosity, and seeking the answers, not just letting them die. 3. pushing yourself to be the best at what you and your partner like: mastery.
But… There were also rules. She set up goals she hoped to achieve throughout the process, long-term and short-term. Her long-term goal was to “live a wild flourishing life where I am magnetic with creativity and sensuality.” Her short-term goal was to “reconnect my physical, emotional and sexual bodies by orgasming more often and in more interesting ways.”
So… The assignment was to orgasm three times a day over the course of a month. But each time cannot be the same. RLP writes, “each time has to be different (place, position, stimulus).” That adds a bit of challenge into the mix, for sure. The first ten days already led her to quite a few revelations about herself and her sex life.
10 days. She writes, “I realized in the first few days that I was blaming my sexual laziness on being too busy, and not having enough time. Like most things that are important to us but we procrastinate actually doing, I realized that when I prioritize my time and get sexy first thing in the morning it actually doesn’t take that long.”
Halfway. At the halfway point, she realized that she was hitting a bit of difficulty. But she also explains that days 10-20 were moments that changed her sex life forever. “A lot of the assumptions I had about romance, creativity and love were completely shattered then rebuilt,” she writes. Masturbation became a completely different thing for her because her creative boundaries were stretched.
Stretched. She explains, “By week 2, my habit had become more or less instinctual. I didn’t have to set a calendar alert and when I woke up in the morning, sex was the first thing on my mind.” Her creative mind was allowed to wander and she found herself in a deeply sexual energy almost daily. “What if… (I moved this shindig into the living room? Kitchen? My car???),” she writes.
Work. She found the sex challenge even had an affect on her perception of work. RLP wrote, “We work during the day and then sex happens when the lights go out. But the connection between the two became super strong during the second week of my challenge… Unexpectedly, the more I created amazing sexual experiences, the stronger my passion and intuition became.”
Last days. Firmly in her stride, RLP had really achieved something worth celebrating. She wrote, “The culmination of everything that I learned in that 30 days (and the next 90 days after I technically finished the challenge but kept it up) I started to understand and organize into a book about sexual intelligence.”
Intelligence. When it comes to increasing your sexual intelligence, it isn’t terribly hard to do, according to RLP. She writes, “Define what do you really want; choose your information sources wise; communicate concisely; ask weird questions; sex is a practice [so treat it like one]; embrace the awkward, [and] be great at receiving.”
You. Do you think you could last through this 30-day challenge? Or do you think your sex life is just fine the way it is? We want to hear from you out there in cyber space, so let us know your thoughts in the comments section below. Make your voice heard.
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